How to ask for feedback – dos and don’ts

How to ask for feedback. Feedback can be a brilliant work tool. When done right it promotes personal growth, builds confidence and strengthens relationships.

But before you jump in with a casual "How did I do?", there's a lot worth considering.

In my latest podcast episode, I share all my top tips on how to ask for feedback. Plus, a story about the worst piece of feedback I ever got during my time in TV – it still makes me wince! Have a listen and feel free to share it with your colleagues.

Listen and share my podcast (7-mins) - How to ask for feedback

Did you catch my nightmare story? It was painful, unfair, and completely unhelpful!

How to ask for feedback (the right way!)

Feedback is a big topic, so today we’re keeping it simple and discussing how to ask for it the right way.

1. Be clear on what you want

Before you ask, know exactly what you're after. Do you need reassurance, practical tips, or a fresh perspective? Your goal determines how you frame your questions, which means more useful answers.

Maybe you want specific advice on presentation skills or feedback on a project. The more specific you can be, the better.

A vague "How did I do?" might get you a polite "Good job!" – nice to hear, but not much help. Instead, ask targeted questions:

How could I have been clearer in that meeting?

Any ideas on how I could manage the project timeline better?

What would you suggest for improving my approach next time?

Precision makes feedback actionable.

Bit Famous works with businesses and organisations
to help them communicate with confidence.

By Penny Haslam

MD and Founder - Bit Famous

Workplace Confidence

FREE resources for leaders and people professionals from Penny Haslam and Bit Famous

Sign up for my awesome Workplace Confidence email

Inside the study: what we’ve learned from mastermind groups in police leadership

The power of colleague-led learning

A beginner’s guide to difficult conversations at work

An introduction to difficult conversations at work

How to build confidence when you don’t have the answers

Bit Famous – Finalist, Learning and Development Supplier of the Year 2025

“I’m no good at that” – challenging limiting beliefs and negative self-labelling at work

Making space for real confidence at work

The value of val-yous: why reflecting on personal values can boost your colleagues confidence and sharpen decision making

Is your town hall meeting in trouble?

Why presentation skills training isn’t always the answer

Great Job! Why recognition needs a rethink

Workplace Confidence Podcast

Where people professionals share the great work they do!

10 reasonsTo work with Bit Famous

Let's talkBook a no-obligation discovery call

FREE ResourcesFor leaders and people professionals

2. Pick the right people

Who you ask matters as much as what you ask. Sure, you could go straight to your boss, but they might not always give you what you need. Consider asking a mix of people:

Maybe a close colleague who knows your work style

A mentor who gets your goals

Or even someone who can offer an outsider's perspective.

It’ll help you get a well-rounded, balanced view.

3. Timing is everything

Don’t corner people for instant feedback. Give them some notice so they can provide thoughtful input, not just a rushed opinion. If I’d given my editor a bit of time, maybe I wouldn't have ended up with that awful piece of feedback.

Let them know what you’d like feedback on

Ask for honest, constructive insights

Give them a chance to reflect.

You'll see the quality of their input improve massively.

What if the feedback misses the mark?

Not all feedback hits home. Sometimes it's poorly delivered or just plain hurtful. Remember, feedback is simply information – not the ultimate truth about you. Take what’s helpful, thank them and move on. Don’t let it knock your confidence.